• WiFi:connected
  • Me:then fucking act like it
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fiyhi:

patron-de-los-santos:

mcdamnright:

So I was at a thrift store and I see this little cat lamp.

image

I was like “Aye yo, ya’ll are fuckin’ adorable.”
So I bought the lil’ guy and took him home to plug him in.

image

Then I was like “No.”

well no wonder why it was in the thrift store

but shit it was 99 cents

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everkings:

emmalionbryan:

sixthrock:

sofapizza:

pleatedjeans:

This dog barks like a person screaming for his life. [via]

their neighbors must be terrified.

*wag wag wag*
*happy dog face*
*BLOODCURDLING DEATH SCREECH*
*wag wag wag*

IM DYING

I can’t breathe

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samapitongzabala:

i just heard my mom tell my dad ‘check this out… a penis’

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friclge:

I don’t wanna go to work. I don’t wanna grow up. I’m not going, I’m going to stay home and watch Mulan

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A poem begins with a lump in the throat.

Robert Frost (via writingquotes)
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howunpleasant:

friday at school i heard some girl in the hall way scream “FOR THE LAST TIME BITCH IM LESBIAN IM NOT TRYING TO STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND HE SMELLS LIKE KETCHUP ANYWAYS”

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